A recipe for living with cancer.

I am done

Radiation is done, I had my last radiation treatment today. Even with burned skin under my arm, tightness that restricts my movement, I woke up this morning humming, a feeling of lightness and joy that bubbled up from my toes to the top of my head. I felt like Winnie-the-Poo humming merrily as he stood on his tip toes reaching high up on the shelf for that last pot of honey. The anticipation of that first taste of sweet honey caused Poo to burst into song with a sense of unadulterated joy. I have never woken up humming but today I did and it was a nonsensical tune I didn’t even recognize. It was just…joy.

On the drive to the hospital the songs on the radio sounded sweeter, the sun shined brighter and the knowledge I’d reached another milestone plastered a grin across my face. When the x-ray monster traveled over my chest one last time I yelled “done!” and the therapists all laughed, gave me a hug and wished me luck. As I left they called me back and handed me a certificate of completion covered With their signatures and messages of hope and faith.

I’d made a huge platter of cookies and cakes to thank the staff of the radiation department. They were kind, efficient, funny, informational, patient and made going every day tolerable. As slow as each treatment and surgery went I realized today it’s been a year since diagnosis, I can hardly believe its been a year.

Now all that is left is reconstruction surgery and five years of an aromatase inhibitor in the form of a pill. Then we wait. I don’t believe in the “5 year cure” in fact I think once metastasized, like a bad penny, cancer cells will turn up some day down the road but i hope the road is a long one!
But for now I am done.

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